let's start from the beginning

My first brush with this beautiful thing called romance happened when i was in my 9th grade.

' Be my valentine ' said this cute card made in handmade artistic paper with letters cut out from newspapers and the sender left me guessing as the addresse had only a zodiac sign- Scorpio and no name. Even though it was a prank played by none other than my best friend it set forth a whole gamut of emotions and i am still reeling in the after effects as i am an incurable romantic at heart. This was way back when i was hopelessly into mills and boons and had millions of secret dreams. DREAMS IN COLOUR which had slivery sandy beaches, gently swaying breeze,frondy palms,and a tall someone with whom i would be walking hand in hand . He bending down and whispering sweet nothings,while i would be coy and ecstatic with the fluttering of a thousand butterflies inside. Needless to say then that it would be dusk and i would be in a white feminine dress which of course would be swaying as if to accentuate my femininity.Strange but true, i could never get to see all this from the front. Elusive! yet it would keep me weak in my knees and waiting for that dream to happen when i could see him and me in full view up and front. i really am amazed how my obsession with anything white actually started with dreams.

i now see all around me this intense craze for valentine day and it prompted me to go down memory lane.But i wonder if in this fast forward world where everything is instant, romance is actually what it should be. i feel it has got polluted along with the others.That Romance is a beautiful process which starts from having a glimpse of each other and then proceeding gradually to the works if any chemistry existed. The teacher in me wants to stand in a public place and warn the youngsters and to plead them to slow down. i see from the newspapers that things like chocolate and flowers are passe and now valentine gifts are more risque and it wants me to tear my hair in despair. Imagine going to see a blockbuster after knowing the whole story. What fun or thrill can one experience in that? i know i may be sounding foolish but that softness,that freshness,that sweetness,that charm is now extinct. Choice is a personal thing and i guess people prefer differently now but i want to keep on feeling this that, just like other emotions love is the most beautiful one and that it should be expressed and it should be able to gratify your desires but i would prefer the old school wooing which had everything...beginning from eye contact, sending love messages, getting to know each other, flowers , chocolates, long rides with romantic numbers, trusting, accepting and believing without guarantee and finally kissing. i am not at all comfortable with all this auto- operative system in which much is already known beforehand and much is taken for granted.For me romance is that one look that says hey you look beautiful and not sexy, that warm grab of the hand in the middle of a crowd which says don't worry i am by your side and sometimes even conveys baby i want you, that suddenly coming from behind and kissing you passionately just when you are about to give tadka to your dal, that surprise tickets to the show you desperately wanted to see, that naughty look of confirmation in the middle of the show and then turning to look deeply at each other...So today while my husband and i nibbled our respective sandwiches and had Jamun sherbet at this lovely cafe attached to a boutique we shared the thrill of these youngsters who were seen walking in an out of the florists with bouquets...red roses,lilies,anthuriums,orchids and some exotic ones the names of which i know not. We both smiled at each other and nodded in affirmation. All is not lost afterall and that calls for a celebration. This gazhal of yesteryears perhaps sums up all that i had to say and i all that i couldn't for the time being.It is one of the lesser known ones by the famous Ghazal singing couple of the 80's Jagjit Singh and Chitra singh and the words are: us more se shuru karein phir ye zindagi
har shaiy jahan haseen thi
hum tum the ajnabi... Meanwhile i have my fill for the day as Ahista Ahista plays in the background because i have enjoyed all the fuss and pampering for the day as it was Sunday and to top it all a very happy Valentine's Day.